When the “Most Wonderful Time of the Year” Feels Like the Hardest: A Holiday Reflection for Healthcare Workers

The end of the year comes with a certain script.We’re told it’s the season of joy, celebration, gratitude, and togetherness. Streets light up, holiday music plays everywhere you go, and every commercial insists you should be happily baking cookies or exchanging perfectly wrapped gifts with smiling family members.

But if you work in healthcare, you know there’s another version of this season—one that rarely makes it into the holiday movies.

It’s the time of year when stress levels skyrocket, not because you’re doing anything wrong, but because life and illness don’t magically pause just because the calendar says it’s time to be merry. And that contradiction between what the world expects and what you’re actually experiencing can deepen the exhaustion you’ve been carrying all year.

Holiday Stress Isn’t All Bad… But It’s Still Stress

Some holiday stress is the “good” kind—the anticipation of seeing loved ones, the break in routine, the fun of traditions. But even joyful stress is still stress. Travel, hosting, cooking, scheduling, financial pressures, and trying to coordinate multiple families’ expectations can stretch anyone thin.

And then there’s the other side—the stress that’s heavier.The stress that makes people dread this season rather than celebrate it.

Family dynamics.Loneliness.Loss.Unrealistic pressures.Or simply not having the emotional space to be “festive.”

For many healthcare workers, the holidays live at the intersection of both: simultaneously meaningful and overwhelming, beautiful and draining.

When You’re Caring for Others at the Exact Time You’re Supposed to Be “Off”

There’s a reason healthcare workers feel the weight of this season more than most.

While other industries slow down, healthcare often speeds up.

Cold and flu season peaks.Viruses circulate through schools.Kids are home on break, which means parents are home with them—and suddenly have time to schedule visits.Patients want to “get everything done” before the year ends, especially once they’ve met their deductible. And, inevitably, team members get sick, take time off, or travel… leaving those remaining to pick up extra call, clinic coverage, or hospital shifts.

You’re caring for patients on their worst days while everyone else seems to be celebrating their best days. And that disconnect is real.

Holidays are more than the food

In my experience, this is the time of year when families struggle the most to understand. People outside healthcare assume that holidays mean slowing down, stepping back, or taking time off. But illness doesn’t check the calendar. Emergencies don’t wait for the new year. And patients don’t stop needing us simply because it’s December.

Trying to explain this to family members—especially ones who equate holidays with togetherness—can create even more strain. You can love your family deeply and still feel misunderstood.

The Pressure to Be Everything to Everyone

This season can amplify the existing pressure you already feel during the rest of the year. You might feel pulled in three directions:

• Your patients, who still need you.

• Your team, who depends on you to help cover during this chaotic stretch.

• Your family, who wants your presence, energy, and emotional availability.

And in the middle of all of it, there’s you.

Except this time of year, “you” tends to come last—if you make the list at all.

The frustration and depletion so many healthcare workers feel in December aren’t signs of weakness or lack of gratitude. They’re signs that you’re human. You cannot carry double the stress, double the expectations, and double the emotional output without consequences.

But what often makes it feel worse is this:You’re expected to be happy about all of it.

Expected to show up to holiday events with a smile.Expected to keep saying yes.Expected to be cheerful, grateful, and festive.Expected to “push through” because the season is supposed to be magical.

And when you don’t feel that automatic joy?It can feel like something is wrong with you—when nothing is wrong at all. You’re just overwhelmed.

It’s Okay If Joy Isn’t the Dominant Emotion This Season

Maybe you’re tired.Maybe you’re grieving.Maybe you’re stretched thin.Maybe you’re resentful of the extra shifts, the lack of understanding, the feeling that you’re holding everything together with frayed edges.Maybe you’re simply at capacity.

You don’t have to pretend.

You don’t have to manufacture joy you don’t feel.

You don’t have to show up with artificial cheer just to make other people comfortable.

The holidays don’t require emotional performance.

What they can offer—if you allow it—is a moment to reflect on what you need, what truly matters, and how you want to move into the next year.

Permission to Put Yourself Back on the List

Here’s the truth:You do not have to be everything to everyone—not in November, not in December, not in January, not ever.

Your worth is not measured by how many shifts you cover.It does not rise because you sacrifice your needs.It does not fall because you need rest, space, or help.

What if this season could be an invitation—not to do or give more, but to pause?

To check in with yourself.To let yourself feel what you feel.To stop pretending.To put your wellbeing back at the center where it belongs.

If the holidays are hard for you this year, you’re not alone. And nothing about that makes you ungrateful, unkind, or uncommitted.

It just makes you human.

If You Want Support Navigating This Season (and Beyond)

If you’re reading this and realizing you’ve been running on fumes—or you see yourself slipping into old patterns of overgiving, overextending, and overworking—then support is available.

You don’t have to do this alone.

If you want personalized, high-touch guidance as you move toward a more sustainable, balanced version of your life and career, consider coaching.Together, we can untangle the pressures you’re carrying, build clarity around your needs and values, and help you step into the new year from a grounded place—not a burned-out one. Reach out with this form and I will send you information.