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Writer's pictureSantina Wheat

I Feel Like No One Understands

"I feel like no one understands…" This refrain may sound familiar when experiencing burnout.


When it seems like everything is going wrong, every small inconvenience, stumble, or frustration can feel like a travesty. It may seem like no one is listening or willing to help. When I was feeling burned out, the only path forward seemed like a path out of my role. At every turn, I found a problem with the processes and felt like no one cared about what the physicians needed. There were many nights when I just did not want to show up to work. I had to make a decision: continue to be miserable, find a new employer, or make a change within my role. During this time, I often questioned whether I should even continue in clinical medicine. Ultimately, I decided that I wanted to stay in clinical medicine but needed to figure out how.


Part of my challenge was the stress at home. This was happening at a time when several family members had health crises, and my husband and I were trying to manage their health, raise small children, and show up every day to jobs that we cared about.


I needed a pathway forward.


At the time, I did not have a clear path. I chose to focus first on myself. I spent time caring for my physical and mental health. I removed obstacles to exercise and prioritized my well-being. This helped a lot, and I was able to be open to other changes. The tools I learned over the years, I wish I had internalized more quickly.


Three Things I Wish I Had Done Sooner:


  1. Appreciate What Is Going Well: Take a few moments to appreciate what is going well. This may mean appreciating a person—someone who helped you, who went above and beyond, or who took a moment to listen. Maybe you appreciate that a new process went well and made your day a little better. When we stop complaining and take a few minutes to appreciate, it allows our outlook to shift.

  2. Learn More About the Processes That Bother You: Some tasks feel endlessly daunting until you learn the tricks! New technology, resources, and built-in calendar tools have made my life easier. This is true of many things, particularly when software-related.

  3. Make Recommendations for Improvement: When you are part of the solution, it can be beneficial in a few ways. You can demonstrate your own commitment to improvement. You may be viewed as a part of the solution instead of adding to the noise. This also allows you to feel like part of the solution and work to make things better.


I will never say that it is up to the individual to make everything better. However, we can do things to help us thrive even in imperfect situations.



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